07. CLAUSE 6.3.1
Clause 6.3.1 :
Only a candidate who has secured not less than 75% of overall
attendance shall be deemed to have satisfied the requirements for
completion of a semester
This two lined clause is what my whole college life revolved around .
Going to college was an ordeal. First the long 2hr trip all the way from home sweet home to college via I dont know ...PLUTO ?? Cuz it really seemed to take that long .
And once there , one had to sit there listening to these wierd looking creatures {...I think the bus picked them up on our stopover at pluto..} , teaching in a language that they claimed to be english !!
All my peers would dilligently write what they called "notes" after deciphering what the bugger had crapped . There were times wen I made attempts to listen to what they were blabbering .... and it was nothing but MURDER of science !!
I never understood the concept of taking notes . Why would I waste time , ink and paper , to write something that I would never read , or SHOULD never read.... cuz for one , it was a disgrace to the english language . Two, we all knew that the prof knew zilch about the subject , and he would anyway dictate it from some book ....why couldn't we just read it directly from the book ?!
The objective of engineering is to decrease work and we were working exactly against it !!
LakshmipatiKrishnaswamy's notes became hot stuff a week before the exams . Many precious redwood trees were felled to make his notes . U name a kid something like that , what do u expect him to become ?!! Had I been LK ( and thank god I was not ) , I'd have made some green bills selling notes . LK however was not that smart , infact he was the total anti-thesis of smart . But lummox-heads like him were worshipped and looked upon as brainy people . Whilst anti-notes-writing logical lesser mortals like me were supposed to be idiots !!
***
Imagine sitting 8 hrs of 2 hour shifts straight, on a wooden bench , nodding to the rythm of the lecture that was delivered in pseudo-english but with a strong sing-song cadence of the local dialect.
Obviously I couldn't go on like that . One must focus on solutions . And thats what I did . I devised algorithms to make use of this time ...
soln #1. Sleep ..... dint work . got caught twice just attempting to do so .
soln #2. Sing ..... well it did work , but it also resulted in being thrown out of the class twice .
soln #3. Read .... this one was the most effecient algorithm . I'd read not less than 100 books just in the class . I'd enough time to rewrite LOTR .
soln #n. Other temporary solns involved .... designing cars , making cartoons , writing poems .
So basically , coming to college was an ordeal , and I made sure that I dint attend one more than the required no. of days .However math can get tricky , specially when u are assuming too many parameters.
It was jus another day , two weeks before the exams , when the peon came and read out the circular:
" The following students will not be allowed to write the exam for lack of attendance :
G.Ramaswamy ( rollno. 47) and Sameer Khanna(roll no. 56) "
Well , I dont know if it is physical disfiguring of the neural patterns or plain dementia , but my body doesnt respond humanly to stimuli like this . For a moment I was the cynosure of the class . And the only thing I was thinking of was to say something really funny , that wud make me look really cool !! I was very aware of my facial contortions and my tongue .
I mean , here I was virtually sentenced to death as per Clause 6.3.1 and I wanted to crack a joke!! Then gradually as the news sank in , my heart rate escalated . I did manage to keep a very amused look though . And as I walked towards my friend .. wats his name again ... ya Ramswamy someone .... I ran thru wat my life was going to be ..... I dint care of GeorgiaTech , even if dint never made it to the states it wud be ok , all I wanted now was to live a normal life ...
As I walked people stared at me hoping their life wasnt as sick as mine ... that's wen I started laughing , its a dysfunction , I cant control it ... and then they all were sure that I kind of deserved it .... this is wat happens wen u act calm in situations where u are not supposed to .... u get the sympathy of people only when make a big deal out of it .... see thats how girls operate ... they totally freak out for the smallest thing and then get their way thru with all the sympathies .
Anyway , with some quick math , I calculated that I might still make it to the other side of 75 if I came everyday for the next couple of weeks and boosted my attendance . But one cant live under assumptions . I'd to go to the Principal , and do some major negotiations where I was labouring not to laugh , more than getting my point through .
Then with a little help of my acting skills and after giving my virtual mother a virtual disease , and after writing half a dozen letters , on A4 sheets { that suprisingly just disappear from the face of the earth in situations like these } , in the correct format {..does TO come before FROM , does SUB come after SIR ....who the F*** cares ?!! ... my life was hanging on really weak sliver of hope and they cared about the goddamn format ?!} .... I escaped being detained a year .
Phew !!
Everytime I think of how bad it could have got , all the blood just drains away from the head region .
But , at the end of it all ...as my dad would put it ... it was a good experience !!
Only a candidate who has secured not less than 75% of overall
attendance shall be deemed to have satisfied the requirements for
completion of a semester
This two lined clause is what my whole college life revolved around .
Going to college was an ordeal. First the long 2hr trip all the way from home sweet home to college via I dont know ...PLUTO ?? Cuz it really seemed to take that long .
And once there , one had to sit there listening to these wierd looking creatures {...I think the bus picked them up on our stopover at pluto..} , teaching in a language that they claimed to be english !!
All my peers would dilligently write what they called "notes" after deciphering what the bugger had crapped . There were times wen I made attempts to listen to what they were blabbering .... and it was nothing but MURDER of science !!
I never understood the concept of taking notes . Why would I waste time , ink and paper , to write something that I would never read , or SHOULD never read.... cuz for one , it was a disgrace to the english language . Two, we all knew that the prof knew zilch about the subject , and he would anyway dictate it from some book ....why couldn't we just read it directly from the book ?!
The objective of engineering is to decrease work and we were working exactly against it !!
LakshmipatiKrishnaswamy's notes became hot stuff a week before the exams . Many precious redwood trees were felled to make his notes . U name a kid something like that , what do u expect him to become ?!! Had I been LK ( and thank god I was not ) , I'd have made some green bills selling notes . LK however was not that smart , infact he was the total anti-thesis of smart . But lummox-heads like him were worshipped and looked upon as brainy people . Whilst anti-notes-writing logical lesser mortals like me were supposed to be idiots !!
***
Imagine sitting 8 hrs of 2 hour shifts straight, on a wooden bench , nodding to the rythm of the lecture that was delivered in pseudo-english but with a strong sing-song cadence of the local dialect.
Obviously I couldn't go on like that . One must focus on solutions . And thats what I did . I devised algorithms to make use of this time ...
soln #1. Sleep ..... dint work . got caught twice just attempting to do so .
soln #2. Sing ..... well it did work , but it also resulted in being thrown out of the class twice .
soln #3. Read .... this one was the most effecient algorithm . I'd read not less than 100 books just in the class . I'd enough time to rewrite LOTR .
soln #n. Other temporary solns involved .... designing cars , making cartoons , writing poems .
So basically , coming to college was an ordeal , and I made sure that I dint attend one more than the required no. of days .However math can get tricky , specially when u are assuming too many parameters.
It was jus another day , two weeks before the exams , when the peon came and read out the circular:
" The following students will not be allowed to write the exam for lack of attendance :
G.Ramaswamy ( rollno. 47) and Sameer Khanna(roll no. 56) "
Well , I dont know if it is physical disfiguring of the neural patterns or plain dementia , but my body doesnt respond humanly to stimuli like this . For a moment I was the cynosure of the class . And the only thing I was thinking of was to say something really funny , that wud make me look really cool !! I was very aware of my facial contortions and my tongue .
I mean , here I was virtually sentenced to death as per Clause 6.3.1 and I wanted to crack a joke!! Then gradually as the news sank in , my heart rate escalated . I did manage to keep a very amused look though . And as I walked towards my friend .. wats his name again ... ya Ramswamy someone .... I ran thru wat my life was going to be ..... I dint care of GeorgiaTech , even if dint never made it to the states it wud be ok , all I wanted now was to live a normal life ...
As I walked people stared at me hoping their life wasnt as sick as mine ... that's wen I started laughing , its a dysfunction , I cant control it ... and then they all were sure that I kind of deserved it .... this is wat happens wen u act calm in situations where u are not supposed to .... u get the sympathy of people only when make a big deal out of it .... see thats how girls operate ... they totally freak out for the smallest thing and then get their way thru with all the sympathies .
Anyway , with some quick math , I calculated that I might still make it to the other side of 75 if I came everyday for the next couple of weeks and boosted my attendance . But one cant live under assumptions . I'd to go to the Principal , and do some major negotiations where I was labouring not to laugh , more than getting my point through .
Then with a little help of my acting skills and after giving my virtual mother a virtual disease , and after writing half a dozen letters , on A4 sheets { that suprisingly just disappear from the face of the earth in situations like these } , in the correct format {..does TO come before FROM , does SUB come after SIR ....who the F*** cares ?!! ... my life was hanging on really weak sliver of hope and they cared about the goddamn format ?!} .... I escaped being detained a year .
Phew !!
Everytime I think of how bad it could have got , all the blood just drains away from the head region .
But , at the end of it all ...as my dad would put it ... it was a good experience !!
posted by scoffes at 10:51 AM
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